“Uhhh. So good to see you again yeah.”

Some people aren’t for you. That’s a true fact.

They’re annoying, or duplicitous or they’re just a bully built on a firm foundation of sadness and insecurity, which is fine. 

So, while you can’t get along with everyone, you also can’t avoid them either. And with summer here (and the restrictions eased), I reckon it’s a good idea to have a plan in place for when you run into that person you absolutely loathe. Because drama is very 2019, and 2020 has been horrendous enough.

The Michelle Obama approach.

“When they go low, we go high.” That means don’t be drawn into their petty shit.

Fight the urge to have the last word or to drip some acidic stage whisper that’s likely to illicit a feisty response. Instead, relax. Grab yourself a doobie, get high and revel in the fact that you’re a boss. I’m pretty sure that’s what Michelle meant.

The classic “just ignore them” approach.

I tried this once, and somehow still managed to be “just as bad” as the antagonist.

But I stand by it. If someone’s being a total knob, just ignore them like you ignore advice from your parents, or the health warning on poppers. You’ll look confident, and the jerk will eventually do something really over-dramatic to get your attention, which is when everyone will discover just how annoying they are.

Start with a little kindness.

I know this girl from uni. She was a champion of collegiate negotiations, and when she was ready to confront me about something (because I’m not immune to being a brat), she’d often start with, “hey is everything okay? You’ve been acting kinda off lately.” Then when I said I was fine, she’d rip into me.

The point is, your mates are your mates: you should try to give them the benefit of the doubt before lashing out. Plus, this approach saves you the embarrassment of, like, ripping into your mate only to find out they’re dealing with some ~wiggly~ personal crisis.

Break the silence.

Text the person ahead of time (if the run-in is going to be unavoidable) and try focus on some mutually good thing, like, “Hey, I’ve heard you’re going to be at Jarrod’s house party too – hope his stupid housemate starts crying again because she can’t handle her alcohol!”

I like this approach because the silence between two people is often more toxic than it needs to be, ya know. Things fester and weird little incidents are interpreted in unhelpful ways, so it’s often a positive idea to be an adult and have a bloody conversation.

The most important thing: always try to be nice. Even to jerk faces. They can’t help that they’re shit.